No two parents will ever see eye to eye on everything, and that’s okay. From sleep training to screen time, discipline to diet, differing parenting styles are common—even in the strongest relationships. The key isn’t to agree on everything, but to find ways to manage differences without turning them into battles. What is our advice and how do our nannies fit into this dynamic?
Why Do Parenting Disagreements Happen?
Parenting styles are shaped by our own upbringings, values, and personal experiences. One parent may prioritize structure and routine, while the other leans towards flexibility and independence. Sometimes, differences emerge gradually, with one parent realizing they feel strongly about a topic they hadn’t considered before. This can happen in any family and is a natural process.
How to Manage Parenting Differences Without Conflict?
Pause Before Reacting – When a disagreement arises, resist the urge to respond emotionally. Take a step back and reflect on why the issue feels important to you. Not every battle needs to be won immediately.
Find Common Ground – Even if you disagree on approach, chances are you both want the best for your child. Focus on shared values—whether it’s raising a kind, confident, or responsible child—and work from there.
Decide What’s Negotiable (and What’s Not) – Some things matter more than others. Identify which parenting issues are must-haves and where you’re open to compromise. For example, bedtime routines may be flexible, but safety rules (like car seats) are non-negotiable.
Present a United Front – Kids are experts at sensing division. If one parent enforces a rule and the other bends it, it can create confusion (and lots of testing boundaries). Even if you don’t agree 100%, backing each other up in front of the child helps maintain structure.
Agree to Revisit Issues – Some parenting debates resolve themselves over time. If an approach isn’t working, be open to adjusting. Parenting is a constant learning process, and what feels right today may shift as your child grows.
Parenting Styles and Childcare Professionals
Parenting style dynamics are difficult to navigate to begin with, so what happens when you add a nanny to that equation? At The Governess & Co we have invested in developing customized tools to evaluate your parenting style with childcare experts, to make sure we can match you with a nanny that suits your style. Our goal is to ensure a seamless connection between your family’s values and the childcare professional’s approach, creating a stable and nurturing environment for your child.
Remember: different perspectives don’t mean bad parenting—they mean your child benefits from a balanced approach. Instead of focusing on winning arguments, shift the focus to what truly works for your family. At the end of the day, a strong parenting team is one that listens, adapts, and supports each other, and a professionally trained nanny selected based on a complex evaluation to suit your parenting style will be another great element in this team!